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Thread: sa mai si radem

  1. #46
    MsHi.Adv
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    Joke:

    An architect is a guy who isint man enough to be an engineer and not gay enough to be an fashion designer.

    (singurul pe care il stiu din "breasla")

    Inca mai astept unele cu copywriteri.

  2. #47
    not human anymore [Moderator] micutzu's Avatar
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    realitatea cruda
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    Someone who thinks logically provides a nice contrast to the real world.

  3. #48
    not human anymore [Moderator] micutzu's Avatar
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    Next time you have a bad day at work, think of this guy........



    Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Mayo. Heperforms underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs. Below is an email he sent to his sister. She then sent it to RnaG (Irish radio station) in Galway,who was sponsoring a worst job experience contest. Needless to say, she won.



    Hi Sue

    Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realise it's not so bad after all.



    Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job. As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wet suit. This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater. This £20,000 piece of equipment sucks > the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose.



    Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times with no complaints. What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit. This floods my > whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi.



    Everything was going well until all of sudden, my butt started to itch. So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a few seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done. In agony I realised what had happened. The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit.



    Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it. However, the crack of my arse was not as fortunate. When scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into the crack of my arse . I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five other divers, were all laughing hysterically.



    Needless to say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make three agonizing in-water decompression stops totalling thirty-five minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression.

    When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet. As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my arse as soon as I got in the chamber.



    The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't poop for two days because my hole was swollen shut.





    So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your backside. Now repeat to yourself, "I love my job, I love my job, I love my job."
    Someone who thinks logically provides a nice contrast to the real world.

  4. #49
    not human anymore [Moderator] micutzu's Avatar
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    se aplica in toate domeniile... :)

    Bill Gates recently
    gave a speech at a High School about 11 things they did not and will not
    learn in school.
    He talks about how feel-good, politically correct teachings created a
    generation of kids with no concept of reality and how this concept set
    them up for failurein the real world.

    Rule 1 : Life is not fair -- get used to it!

    Rule 2 : The world won't care about your self-esteem. The world will
    expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.

    Rule 3 : You will NOT make $60,000 a year right out of high school. You
    won't be a vice-president with a car phone until you earn both.

    Rule 4 : If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss.

    Rule 5 : Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your Grandparents
    had a different word for burger flipping: they called it opportunity.

    Rule 6 : If you mess up, it's not your parents' fault, so don't whine
    about your mistakes, learn from them.

    Rule 7 : Before you were born, your parents weren't as boring as they
    are
    now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes and
    listening to you talk about how cool you thought you were. So before you

    save the rain forest from the parasites of your parent's generation, try
    delousing the closet in your own room.

    Rule 8 : Your school may have done away with winners and losers, but
    life
    HAS NOT. In some schools, they have abolished failing grades and they'll
    give you as MANY TIMES as you want to get the right answer. This doesn't
    bear the slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life.

    Rule 9 : Life is not divided into semesters. You don't get summers off
    and very few employers are interested in helping you FIND YOURSELF.
    Do that on your own time.

    Rule 10 : Television is NOT real life. In real life people actually have
    to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.

    Rule 11 : Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one.
    Someone who thinks logically provides a nice contrast to the real world.

  5. #50
    VA member adeithrra's Avatar
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    haha, a fost o lectura placuta.:)) M-a impresionat cel mai mult regula nr.8. Partea trista e ca toate sunt adevarate... mai ales cea cu no summer off after school.:|
    flawless foolishness.

  6. #51
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    sunt adevarate dar incomplete :)
    urasc fatalitatea din tipul asta de invataminte.
    1 for example ar fi trebuit sa sune cam asa
    Life is not fair -- DON'T get used to it! Instead find who's F ... ing with your life and give him the same treatment.

  7. #52
    VA member adeithrra's Avatar
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    Ca sa demonstrezi ca ce? Iti faci singur dreptate? Mi se pare o pierdere de timp. In fine, conversatiile astea nu-si au rostul aici, sa nu dam in offtopic.:)
    flawless foolishness.

  8. #53
    not human anymore [Moderator] micutzu's Avatar
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    sa nu dati in off topic,va rog :)
    eu am pus chestia asta aici ca sa ne amuzam nu ca sa o recitam dimineata la pranz si seara pe post de principii de viata :)
    choose life
    Someone who thinks logically provides a nice contrast to the real world.

  9. #54
    VA member adeithrra's Avatar
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    Ai dreptate.Stai linistit. Your thread is safe with us.:D
    flawless foolishness.

  10. #55
    not human anymore [Moderator] micutzu's Avatar
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    din nou pozne de pe santiere :)...in cazul de fata o echipa monteaza niste bolarzi noi in fata unei cladiri(bolarzii sunt betzele alea care nu lasa masinile sa se suie pe trotuar). Vedeti vreo problema? :D
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    Someone who thinks logically provides a nice contrast to the real world.

  11. #56
    VA member tassdj's Avatar
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    :))) tare, probabil vor muta stalpul la iesire :P

    am citit azi un banc fain

    A hamster and a rat were sitting on the side of a swimming pool. They were enjoying the sun. Suddenly the rat turned to the hamster and asked him: - Dude, How come people consider me a noisance, and you a pet? How come people pay money to have you, while they are trying to kill me? How come you are considered a cute little animal, while I am considered creepy and disgusting? How come you live in a warm home, and I have to stay in the sewer? So the hamster answered: -It's branding, dude.

  12. #57
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    mi a luat cateva secunde...

  13. #58
    not human anymore [Moderator] micutzu's Avatar
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    dragilor,fara suparare dar nu vreau sa facem aici un bancuri.ro.
    Ideea era sa fie bancuri cu/despre arhitecti, designeri,graficieni,etc sau chastii generale de viata/profesie care se aplica in campul muncii.
    Let's try to keep it visual.
    asta ultimul il sterg :)
    Someone who thinks logically provides a nice contrast to the real world.

  14. #59
    Registered User Chriss's Avatar
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    Păi poate cine ştie... aşa e procedura :) Probabil să nu treacă şi oamenii... who knows?

  15. #60
    VA member geostik's Avatar
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    hai ca sunt penibili aia. nush, ma gandesc ca au mai facut asta la viatza lor, shi totushi, sa zicem ca unu se grabeste sa ajunga la nevasta-sa shi nu e atent, dar celalalt ?

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